What’s the WORST Advice on Job Loss or Job Hunting You Ever Got??

What’s the WORST Advice on Job Loss or Job Hunting You Ever Got??

Let’s face it, some advice really stinks!

What’s the WORST advice you received on job loss or job hunting?

I’m compiling a top 10 (or maybe I should call it bottom 10) list and so I’m asking for input. Entries selected will be paid $25 to be included in Escape from Unemploymentville book.

But first let me answer the question myself.

The WORST job loss/job hunting advice I received was…

“Don’t feel bad.”

This advice came from a few family members and friends who I won’t name. It also came in a few variations, such as: “You shouldn’t feel bad.” Here is why this advice sucked, because I did feel bad and if, the person talking to me was correct that I shouldn’t be feeling bad, then I was doing something I wasn’t supposed to and must be a further disappointment to said family and friends. Don’t feel bad, is ridiculous, like saying, don’t feel pain.

The only way to get over feeling bad about losing your job or not getting a job offer, or even an interview, is to acknowledge that you do in fact feel bad. You may feel like total dog doo in fact. This is normal. It’s okay to feel bad. The best strategy I found was to admit I was feeling sorry for myself and to just decide how long I wanted to mope for. This time varied depending on what had happened and varied from as short as 15 minutes to a whole day (with relapses allowed the next day).

In hindsight when I was back at work and feeling my usual chipper self I could see that what these friends and family folk were TRYING to say was, “I am proud of who you are and I want you to feel proud of who you are also, not feel bad” or possibly they may have had a bad day themselves and frankly not felt up to seeing my sad frowny face, so maybe “don’t feel bad” meant “I can’t stand to see you sad right now, so please, don’t feel bad.”

Whatever the motive, it doesn’t work like that. You can’t command the blues away. Repressed feelings lead to all kinds of ailments, some physical, some emotional. So if you feel bad, go for it. One person mentioned driving around in their car screaming at the top of their lungs just to get it out of their system. Now that’s feeling bad in style!

YOUR TURN — What’s the WORST job loss or job hunting advice you received. You can respond in the comments below or send an email to admin at unemploymentville.com with a Subject Line of “Worst Advice”.

Related Posts:
What’s the BEST advice You Received on Job Loss or Job Hunting

Escape from Unemploymentville

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One thought on “What’s the WORST Advice on Job Loss or Job Hunting You Ever Got??

  1. The worst advice I ever received was “maybe you should go back to school.”

    I can see where they’re coming from. My degree, a bachelor’s in Fine Arts, has not been helpful when looking for paying work. I’ve seen many friends return to school to study programming or law, after several years of struggling to make ends meet as artists. They save up for another stint at university, stay broke throughout their second schooling career, but generally land a job within a month or two of graduating. The worst part about this advice is that it’s really worked for these friends. They have regular salaries and job security. They’re free to transition into other stages in life: marriage, mortgage, kids. My unemployment makes it impossible to consider these things; all I am free to think about is the fact that I need a job.

    But I don’t want a different career for myself, and hearing that advice from my friends translates into two things: 1) my career will never make me money, and 2) even if artists made money, my art is not good enough.

    I don’t doubt that there are more lucrative paths out there, but that should include new ways of monetizing my craft; things I haven’t tried yet. A better piece of advice, one that I would love to hear more, would be: “maybe you should speak to somebody in your field who has found success, and get their advice instead of mine.”

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